As we are approaching a new year. The feelings are hard to explain. The ending of a year in usual circumstances can bring about many thoughts feelings emotions. Add grief on top of that and it is a whole different story. For us, this is the second year we have gone without our Dad in our life….
Please see New Year and Grief which includes:
- Introduction/Our Story
- Illustrative Examples: New Year and Grief
- New Year And Grief
- Useful Links
- Our Final Thoughts
© Copyright 2019 Grief Probate Journey Blog *PLEASE NOTE THIS INFORMATION IS SOURCED FROM UK and AMERICAN WEBSITES* It is also based on our own experience. *We are not experts in this field, we are speaking purely on our own experience with information sought from the internet to give further examples.*
1. Introduction/Our Story
As we are approaching a new year. The feelings are hard to explain. The ending of a year in usual circumstances can bring about many thoughts feelings emotions. Add grief on top of that and it is a whole different story.
For us, this is the second year we have gone without our Dad in our life. When entering this year (2019):
- We didn’t know what to expect
- What would be in store for us
- What challenges we might face
Because of this, we decided to enter the new year telling ourselves we would try our best too:
- Learn from everything we encountered in the year (2018)
- Try our best to remain positive when dealing with our Dad’s affairs
- Try to not let situations out of our control affect us
- Try our best to take time and look after ourselves
In honesty, this did not last very long. Also in honesty, this feels like one of the worst years’s ever. It feels like it was even more difficult than last year. It feels like it’s gone by the fastest ever. Neither my sister or I were prepared for this. We didn’t expect we would feel like this, we do not know why we feel this way.
I guess we felt that what we’d been through in 2018 would better prepare us for 2019, however that has not been the case. Instead, we have encountered new situations and challenges where once again we were completely out of our depth and feeling like fishes out of water.
To say what we are going through is a learning curve is a big understatement. It has been a very stressful and difficult year this year. With the new challenges come new feelings and emotions.
In the year our Dad passed away (2017) I didn’t want 2018 to come. It was unimaginable having to accept that our Dad wouldn’t be in our life. We entered the year with him in our lives and ended it without him. Devastated, to say the least, was one of the ways we were feeling. We were also very clouded with everything that surrounded our Dad passing away and so it was extremely difficult times.
2018, we made it through, but in honesty, we know this was possible because we used dealing with our Dad’s affairs as distractions to dealing with and facing the fact our Dad wasn’t here. Even though this is a fact. What also kept us going was our Dad’s house. It still being there, us still being able to go there kept us connected to him.
Also, our drive and determination to get justice for our Dad is something else that is focusing us to keep pushing forward.
Life really is a big blur for us. We do not know if it will ever feel any different. We are not the same people since the day our Dad was admitted into hospital on 5th September 2016.
We try our best to continue life as best as possible whilst most importantly also remembering our mum is still here. We love our Dad dearly and will continue in our aim of seeking justice for him, but no matter how busy my sister and I get this is something we must always remember, our Mum is still here and we need to appreciate that fact and appreciate her.
Our mum has her 74th birthday this year, Christmas Birthday. We made a cake, decorated the house with Christmas and Birthday decorations. It was at our house this year which made it more special.
It was nice being at home, we know our Dad would have been happy to know we did it here. It was a happy occasion, but throughout the day I kept feeling very strange. I didn’t know what was wrong. In honesty though, it is the fact our dad wasn’t there. Last year we celebrated Christmas at his house so although he wasn’t there we were in his house.
We are now facing not only a new year but a new decade. That is big. Again, we have no clue or idea what we will face, how these things will make us feel. What we are hopeful for is that the Probate process will come to an end in 2020. Having been dealing with it for over two years, we will be pleased when this is finally completed.
This year has been filled with signs that have led us to believe our Dad is watching over us protecting us, looking out for our Wellbeing and letting us know he is happy with how we are handling things. These signs have always come at the exact right time when we’ve needed them. When these things happen, it feels surreal at times, but we are happy to know our Dad is around. We hope this doesn’t change. The above has more detail in a previous topic: Time: Angel Numbers: Number 7: Biblical Meaning Number 7
We also hope that Grief Probate Journey can continue going from strength to strength. At the beginning of 2019, we hadn’t a clue when or how this blog would get started. Six months on and we are extremely pleased with how well it’s doing. We are happy with:
- The countries it is reaching too,
- We are happy with the number of followers
- We are happy with the comments.
- Most of all we are happy that is helping to make a difference for people.
This is what we wanted and so this is really all we could have asked for.
2. Illustrative Examples: New Year And Grief
3. New Year And Grief
Facing the New Year When You are Bereaved – VITAS Healthcare
When we are grieving, it is hard enough to live each day as it comes. It can be daunting to face a whole new year stretching out in front of us. We may be afraid of what the new year might bring. … Our current experience of emptiness and loneliness may make us reluctant to face a new year.
4. Useful Links:
- Grief in the New Year, Hope to Heal | HuffPost
- So What Does a New Year Mean? Grief Watch
- Holiday Grief in the New Year – Beyond the Broken Heart
- A New Year and the Challenge of Grief | Hello Grief
- Seven Grief Strategies for the New Year – TAPS
- Grieving in the New Year | Claire Bidwell Smith
- 10 Tips for Dealing with New Year Grief | Psychology Today
- 64 New Year’s Resolutions for Grievers – What’s Your Grief
- Carrie Fisher’s Daughter Gives Some Poignant Advice For Everyone Grieving Over The Holidays
5. Our Final Thoughts
We will end this by saying a big massive thank you to our family, friends, supporters, followers. This is what has got Grief Probate Journey where it is today. For this, we are truly grateful.
Here’s too 2020 and:
- A New Year
- A New Decade
- A New Start
And as always we will continue to try our best moving forward with a positive mental attitude.