This is another of those topics that found us. When researching something else, the term fickle came up. We were intrigued to see if this can be connected to grief. We found that it is and this is why we are sharing our findings. There could be someone feeling like this, and not aware this information is out there…….
Please see Fickleness of Grief which covers:
© Copyright 2019 Grief Probate Journey Blog *PLEASE NOTE THIS INFORMATION IS SOURCED FROM UK and AMERICAN WEBSITES* It is also based on our own experience. *We are not experts in this field, we are speaking purely on our own experience with information sought from the internet to give further examples. *
This is another of those topics that found us. When researching something else, the term fickle came up. We were intrigued to see if this can be connected to grief. We found that it is and this is why we are sharing our findings. There could be someone feeling like this, and not aware this information is out there.
When doing research, we came across a quote that really resonated with us, it was from Mind Charity. This statement resonates with us so much, which is why we have used it for the cover of the topic as it sums up our thoughts and feelings. We have also included some useful links from Mind and other useful resources in this topic.
Our Dad passed away six years ago. It is still unbelievable it has been this many years. It doesn’t seem like something that ever feels real. But what I do sometimes notice is that I am aware my Dad is no longer here by not including him in things. By this I mean a family birthday collage, I would always include a picture of our Dad whether it is my sister, mine or my nephew’s birthday. It was my sister’s Birthday recently (October 2022). I did my usual collage and felt it was ready to be posted, and then I looked at it again and realised there was no picture of our Dad in there. It had not come as second nature to include him, that was a strange and surreal feeling. I corrected it by including our Dad and then posting it. But that whole situation brings on realities. Realities of celebrations our Dad will never be part of again. It is a very sad reality.
My sister and I often say we are aware that we almost suppress our feelings with the loss of our Dad. But then the slightest or most random thing can send us on a journey of thinking, sadness despair that our Dad is no longer here. For myself, something I am noticing a lot more these days is feeling a connection and strong emotion when watching someone talk about something they are doing in memory of their loved one who has passed away.
Recent examples would be this year’s Strictly Come Dancing. A number of the contestants were dancing in honour of their loved ones, and when they were talking about it, each time I instantly got emotional as I could feel and understand their passion and emotion for the performance they were about to give. My sister and I, in everything we are doing, always try our best to honour our Dad. We would want to make him proud through the things we are doing.
Please see Fickleness of Grief:
2. Fickleness of Grief
2.1 The Fickle Nature of Grief – Bohdi Counseling
(13 Mar 2018) — “This wave of sorrow, however sudden and jarring, is normal. Grief comes and goes and at times can be felt as lightly as a mere ripple in a pond”, …
2.2 Grief is Fickle – Happiness, Hope & Harsh Realities
(22 Sept 2021) — “Grief is fickle, but it’s not the only one. You see, heart’s are fickle too. Souls are fickle. Life itself is fickle”.
2.3 Fickleness of Grief – Solitude
(26 Feb 2022) — “Grief is a fickle fiend. And totally unpredictable. We have all experienced the loss of a loved one at some point or another”.
2.4 Can grief be fickle? (Mind Charity)
“Grief is a fickle thing, and it hits you in ways that you aren’t prepared for. I’ve always been a fairly confident person so the shift in my mental health that came with grief took me by surprise.” Panic and confusion.”
2.5 Why is grief called a fickle thing?
“How we walk through our grief, though a shared common experience, can be a lonely road with no clearly defined beginning and end. The thing about grief is that when we are in the middle of it, it feels as though it may never end”. (13 Mar 2018).
2.6 Grief is a Fickle Friend – A Widow’s Might
“Though this journey is long and treacherous, with unexpected twists and turns, with the Lord’s’ strength and comfort, it gets better, and joy can still be found”…
2.7 When Grief Shows Up (Sometimes) Years Later | Pathways
“Grief is a fickle thing. Sometimes it doesn’t manifest itself right away as you would assume. Sometimes you repress those feelings and push them down”, …
2.8 Mind on Twitter – There’s no right or wrong way…
“There’s no right or wrong way to feel following a loss. It affects us all in different ways. Sometimes, it’s hard to know how to cope. But there are things that might help. See our website for self-care ideas when you’re grieving & where to get support”: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/bereavement/about-bereavement/
2.9 Mind – Mental Health Charity – This Is Reality
“You Feel Overwhelmed. You Lose Hope. You Feel Alone. This Isn’t Football. This Is Reality. You Can Change a Life Before the Second Half Kicks Off. Make a Difference. Donate to”…
2.10 Helplines and Listening Services – Mind
“Mental health crisis helplines · Samaritans. To talk about anything that is upsetting you, you can contact Samaritans 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. · SANEline”.
2.11 The Lifeline and 988
“988 has been designated as the new three-digit dialling code that will route callers to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (now known as the 988”…
3. Our Final Thoughts
We hope this topic will be of use to those who read it.
4. Our YouTube Video